Inbox (Kaisou)

[schoolingfish]

Am I doing it right? Is it rec-oh! It is! Hi! You missed me, leave a message!

Comments

[prontissimo]

i mean the article said "the deeepest look into space"
so I guess that's technically The Deep right...? 🤨
And it said it sees the oldest galaxies and stuff so that's seeing into the past, right?🤔
yuo know more about this stuff then I do, Luca... honestly 🤷🏽‍♂️😬

But It's definitely prettier than the Deep sea, your right.
We should make the bath room look like that...! I bet we could!🤩
so you can take baths in space HA
✨🌌✨🛀🏻✨🌌✨
🌊🪐🌊☀️🌊🌙🌊

[schoolingfish]

Oh.

[Of course he did.]

At least you got away? I don't think we should fight it. I think that goose is too mean for any of us to actually win.

[schoolingfish]

It definitely sounds like looking into the past! Especially when it says 'what we saw today is the early universe'.

We should! We could definitely paint the whole bathroom to look like that! Even the tub and the sink and the toilet!

[prontissimo]

It's not just mean, it's a bully.

[ He points a finger at Luca, narrowing his eyes. He didn't really have a least favorite bird before; but now he does. ]

C'mon. I'm gonna take a bath. I've got goose on me...

[ He pushes himself up with exaggerated exhaustion, and heads off toward the bathroom, waving Luca along to follow him to keep him company. Because even if one of them is in the bath, the other can still hang out and talk — y'know, like friends do. ]

[prontissimo]

RIGHT how does that make sense?!
And it said they'll see farther and farther eventually
Are they trying to see the start of the Universe or something...!?!

[ It's really beyond Alberto's comprehension. But he likes encouraging Luca about it. ]

YES
we can paint everything black and then put all the stars and stuff on it!!!
You'll have the coolest baths EVER ✨🌟⭐💫✨

[schoolingfish]

Yeah, I guess it is. At least it's just a bird so it can't come inside, and probably won't show up places it doesn't usually go, right?

[It's not like Ercole who they could pretty much run into wherever. Well, except inside Giulia and Massimo's house. Or the ocean.]

Okay.

[Luca follows Alberto to the bathroom, ready to hang out and chat about the evil goose. Like you do.]

And when you say you got goose on you...do you mean like...feathers?

[Or blood? Or goose poop? How exactly did this fight go?]

[schoolingfish]

Of course they are! Wouldn't you want to see the start of the universe if you possibly maybe could? 🤩

Yeah! I can't wait to see our bathroom when we're done with it!🪐

[prontissimo]

how did the universe even start?? Do you know yet?

[ Because obviously Luca will know soon, if not right now. Alberto has no doubt in that.

There’s a considerable delay before another response. Time for construction research…! ]

OK so I looked up How To Paint A Bath Tub on the Any Question Answerer
And no surprise but guess what ha:
We need to buy stuff!
🤑😏💸💰👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👍🏼🤩💵💵💵
🛠🛁🚽🪣🎨✨✍🏼✨✍🏻✨🆒👌🏼

[ Cuz we love buying stuff… Alberto hasn’t taken Luca to the hardware store yet. He’s elated at the idea already. ]

I made a list already of all the stufff we’re going to need and I know EXACTLY where to go…!!! 🤔🥴🤗

[schoolingfish]

Not yet, but I plan to find out!

All right, let's go shopping! 🛍️💰🖌️🌌🖌️🌌

[prontissimo]

Yeah, there's that...

[ He gives a shrug, before drawing the water in the tub and undressing. The goose not being able to follow him is a good thing but of little comfort. He legitimately just got beat up by a goose. It landed a better hit than Ercole did. Alberto's so outraged inwardly... ...and outwardly. He's also outraged outwardly. ]

Nah, not feathers. Like— goose spit... goose dirt. I dunno. I probably got a feather stuck somewhere, though?

[ Not to mention his arm is a little bit bloody from the bite. But that's his own blood. The goose made it out just fine. Well— apart from being punched. It's fine. It'll be fine. ]

[prontissimo]

He doesn't know how the Change works! He didn't see me get wet. Besides, if he goes around saying, "I think these kids are sea monsters because they don't have bellybuttons" — he'll sound crazy to other humans...! Right?! Like— th-the same way normal humans would think it sounds crazy if someone accused them of being monsters! If I were a normal human, I'm supposed think that's really weird and deny it, right?!

[ That's been his operating approach with this situation: How crazy would this accusation sound to a normal human? He should act like how a normal human would act. It's not a convincing case, though, when Alberto's gaps in what's "normal" to humans seem to be as wide as ever... ]

[schoolingfish]

Oh. Yeah, I guess there's probably a lot of goose spit.

[Since there are a lot of bites. Alberto really needs to learn to run away sooner and not try to fight.]

[schoolingfish]

I mean...yeah, saying we're sea monsters will sound crazy. Unless someone actually decides to check whether we have belly buttons. And yeah, normal humans would probably say they weren't sea monsters if you said they were, and probably laugh or seem confused about why you said that.

[Luca might not know much about human behavior, but he also wasn't raised in isolation, so he knows getting too loud or insistent is suspicious in it's own right.]

[prontissimo]

Right! And that's what I did— ...basically! [ That half a breath's pause is so slight, but still enough of a lapse to invite doubt. ]

Look, this guy isn't like Ercole — I don't think he has a reason to go around telling everyone... And you agree that even if he did, it'd just make him look like the weird one — not us. So that means we're okay, right?

[ Alberto's mental gymnastics are as impressive now as they ever were... ]

[schoolingfish]

...basically?

[What does Alberto mean basically?]

Um...yeah, we're probably okay. People probably won't believe him. But we're really going to have to do our best humaning if he does, because after they hear that we're sea monsters if they see us do anything weird they might start thinking he's right!

[prontissimo]

[ Alberto would do well to learn when to run away and when not to fight. But that's... gonna be a long, long lesson. Today, he has not learned it.

He sinks into the tub, only a few inches full, enough for his tail to grow and his feet to turn to flippers. He lets one arm hang over the side of the tub lazily, and slides his tail over the side of the tub just the same, the end of it swaying idly as they chat. Luca's comment draws a wry smile on his face, though, in spite of himself, as he leans back and closes his eyes. ]

Pssh... Y'know, of all the crazy things that've happened to me here? This is the dumbest.

[ He pauses, glancing at Luca suddenly with one eye. ]

...Not me. I mean the goose is dumb.

[ Of course. ]

[schoolingfish]

Yeah...

[Luca follows Alberto into the bathroom, sitting on the toilet seat to chat while Alberto got cleaned off.]

Maybe the goose is like Machiavelli. Maybe it won't be as mean if we give it food.

[prontissimo]

[ Alberto raises his eyebrows at that suggestion. ]

You wanna try and find out?

[ Because Alberto, for one, is not so keen to revisit the park any time soon at all... let alone make amends with the goose. ]

[prontissimo]

Basically, yeah! I-I acted confused— I didn't laugh it off... I acted like he was talking nonsense. Like he was being rude.

[ Which... was suspiciously insistent, as Luca'd probably already guessed. Alberto's already admitted it didn't "go well." But he wants to believe that he didn't just mess everything up for them... a familiar pit has been growing in his stomach at the idea that he might've, though. So, like with most anything, he just doubles down. ]

Look, apart from this bellybutton thing, I haven't been exposed this whole time... You haven't been exposed this whole time...! We've been human-ing perfectly fine. The bellybuttons aren't our fault. We'll just, uh— research what other things like that are necessary to seem human. Easy!

[ How the hell are you going to Google that, Alberto...? He's trying to write off the fact that they don't even know what they don't know. This was a total surprise to them. Alberto's truest fear in all this is simply: what else don't they know? What other quintessentially human details that they lack could blow their cover in a split second? But he's not about to speak to that just yet. He needs to run out of bravado first, of course. ]

[schoolingfish]

Well...no.

But I guess if we want to go to that park for any reason, we could bring food to throw at the goose to see if it works?

[schoolingfish]

Alberto...you didn't get mad at him over saying it, did you?

[Because he's suspecting if stuff got broken and it didn't go well that Alberto started a fight. Which is a terrible idea. And sure, they hadn't gotten caught yet...except Alberto did twice and Luca hasn't been here that long, but okay. They weren't doing terribly at this humaning thing. Most people were convinced. Still, they needed everyone who knew to be on their side.]

[prontissimo]

No, he got mad. He got mad cuz I wouldn't admit it, and then he started being a jerk! I just stood up for myself...!

[ That is... one interpretation of how things went down, yes. Minus the detail that it was Alberto who brought things to a physical level and drastically overreacted; Katsuki's own hot temper just heated Alberto's, they fed into each other's energy, clashing like metal on metal. It escalated quicker than he's making it sound. ]

[prontissimo]

[ The tub is starting to fill up by now, Alberto now about halfway submerged and halfway transformed. He reaches for the cereal bowl he keeps on the side of the tub just for this reason, scooping up water and pouring it over himself to complete his transformation. Sometimes he gets a kick out of staying half-and-half a while, but he's not in the mood. He just wants to feel at ease. He keeps talking as he does so, already imagining the worst of this goose.; Luca's far more forgiving and hopeful. Alberto's holding a grudge. A-Against a bird... ]

What if the goose smells the food? It could just chase us and attack us to try and get the food. Can gooses smell?

[ Period, can they smell. How should he know if every land animal can smell or not. All he knows is he does not trust this bird. ]

[schoolingfish]

[Luca likes relaxing in the bath in full sea monster form and frequently makes use of the cereal bowl, so Alberto's choice makes perfect sense to him. As for his question...it's a reasonable question. Geese might not be able to smell, who knows how land animals work? But, of course, Luca, having even less experience with the surface than Alberto, has no idea.]

Um...I don't know. Maybe? I mean, it's already attacking us whenever it sees us, so it's worth a shot.

[schoolingfish]

Okay. Right. So one of the people who know our secret is mad at us. That's...um...well, I guess we'll figure something out.

[He hopes.]